Sleep, Eat, or Shower: Choose One – The First Month with a Newborn

I knew the first few months having a baby would be life-changing. I just didn’t realize how much; aka: you can shower, sleep, or eat, but you only have time for one, choose wisely. Needless to say, we didn’t have the easiest start to our little family, but we’re powering through.

Bennett was born with sever jaundice. He was born early (37 weeks). We (Bennett and I) have different blood types so his slightly underdeveloped liver had an extra difficult time processing my red blood cells. This led to him being “under the lights” for the first few days of his life. We also had to stay in the hospital longer.

The combination of the jaundice treatment (being away from me), a not great terrible nurse who advised me to “wait a long while” before trying to breastfeed for the first time, and his being born early, resulted in nursing challenges. I ended up seeing many lactation specialists, five to be exact. Who, all determined, I was producing hardly any colostrum and then later, I didn’t produce enough milk. Weight tests before and after feedings determined I was only making about half of what Bennett needed. So, all the lactation specialists and pediatricians advised us to supplement with formula. We needed to get the calories in so he could process the red blood cells and get the bilirubin levels down.

The next couple weeks were spent with daily trips to the doctors to get blood work done for his bilirubin tests and weight checks to see if he was gaining. Bad news for both, for a solid week. Bennett ended up losing almost a pound and his levels did not go down like we hoped. Not being able to produce the food my baby needed made me feel like such a failure. Breastfeeding was something I was passionate about. Eventually (after a lot of formula), we got his bilirubin numbers down (at about 2.5 weeks) and then finally at three weeks old, he passed his birth weight.

Despite everything, I haven’t given up on breastfeeding. It’s a long, hard, and tiring road, but I’m trying. I have modified my six month goal, to a one month goal. Then, I’ll continue to set manageable goals to keep my sanity. The feeding plan is as follows:

• Breastfeed on demand (usually every 1.5 hours but can be up to three hours) this of course includes waking him up throughout the night. I was not prepared for that. At the beginning, he was nursing for 45 minutes to an hour. Around week three, we cut that time to an average of 36 minutes per session.
• After breastfeeding, supplement with formula if he is still showing hunger cues and doesn’t seem satisfied. He never is satisfied after nursing. The supplementation started at one ounce, but has increased as he is getting older and growing.
• After breastfeeding, I pump. Pumping started with 30 minutes after every nursing session. Then we cut it to 20 minutes after every daytime nursing. [I was dying with the previous schedule]. Then, after my body still wasn’t improving, the lactation specialists reduced the pumping to 10 minutes. I know they thought I would give up completely if I kept up with the previous schedules.

So, yes, that is a lot. The whole process takes about 1.5 hours. Yep, by the time I finish the feeding, it is time to get going on another feeding. All day, every day.

Feeding via the syringe

At almost one month, we started with a bottle

10 Things I’ll Miss About Pregnancy (And 10 I Won’t)

Top Ten Things I’ll Miss about Pregnancy

1. Baby Kicks – Feeling my baby move, wiggle, kick, and jab, makes me smile every single time. Even if it hurts. It lets me know he’s healthy and growing.
2. The Excitement – From seeing the word “Pregnant” on that digital test, to telling friends and family, to decorating the nursery and making plans. Everything is exciting.
3. Maternity Pants – These are amazing. I wish real jeans didn’t exist and we all wore maternity jeans all the time.
4. Hearing the heartbeat – magical, every single time.
5. Eating for Two – No I have not used this pregnancy as an excuse to eat whatever I want whenever I want, but it’s still nice to have some extra wiggle room if Baby really needs that cookie – note: don’t do this often if you care about weight gain. Another aspect of “eating for two” is, I am literally supplying my baby with all his nutrition.
6. Super Power – I am growing a tiny human. That is so cool!
7. Never being Alone – No matter what I am doing or where I am, I have a tag-along buddy, so I am never alone. That is comforting.
8. Interaction with Everyone – People in my life have been so excited for us. Even strangers want to share in the joy. It is very connecting and fun to share.
9. Connection with My Husband – I feel a stronger bond with Jimmy knowing we created this life together. The doctor’s appointments, nursery decorating, research on all the baby products is truly a fun adventure we’re sharing together.
10. Getting a Baby – At the end of this, I get my baby. I get to become a parent. I get to raise a child. I cannot wait!

Top Things I will Not Miss about Pregnancy

1. Swollen & Hurting Feet – Oh my goodness, it’s so hard to be active when your feet feel like they’re two sizes too big in shoes two sizes too small. Just walking to the bathroom hurts.
2. Bathroom Trips – Every 10 minutes? Great.
3. Doctors Appointments & Tests – I know prenatal medical care is so important to the health of my baby and me, but I’ve never been a fan of doctors. I also HATE needles. One thing I’ve learned is pregnancy = blood work, so this has been rough.
4. Worrying – I worry every single day about my baby. If I am doing everything correctly to keep him safe. If I am eating the right foods. If I am exercising enough. If I am worrying too much about worrying. I know the worrying won’t stop when he’s born, but I’ll at least have the pressure off my body.
5. Body Changes – Pregnancy is magical and amazing that my body can grow a baby. However, seeing the weight gain on the scale, getting stuck in clothing, looking in the mirror and not seeing your normal self, all this is hard.
6. Decisions –  So many big decisions all at one. Choosing a pediatrician. Choosing a car seat. Choosing a glider. Choosing a name. Choosing what screening tests to have. Choosing maternity leave details/timing. Choosing daycare or to stay home. So many choices in nine months. Breast feeding or formula. Cloth diapers or disposable? And then worrying if you made the right choice. Will this glider squeak and wake up the baby and therefore be responsible for me getting less sleep???
7. Exhaustion – I know, I haven’t seen anything yet. I will be thinking back on the good days when I was just pregnant tired. But, carrying around the extra weight, on the swollen feet, with the compressed lungs, is so tiring. I can’t walk up the stairs from getting water without being tired.
8. Nausea – “Morning sickness” is no joke. I would vomit multiple times a day almost every day. There are medications you can take to help with nausea. I was probably borderline get medication vs power through. I chose to power struggle through. Won’t miss this in the least.
9. Solo Care – While Jimmy is very supportive – especially now that we’re in the third trimester, he’s been great! – growing a tiny human is really just my job. It is a solo thing only I can do. I can verbalize what I’m feeling. I can show the sonogram photos. I can have someone feel a kick (theoretically, but this hasn’t been successful yet). But ultimately, it’s just me and baby on this ride. I can’t tag out for a minute and have Jimmy take over like we will once he’s born.
10. Not Knowing What the *?!#@ is Going on – Yes, I’m reading every book and blog I can get my hands on. Yes, doctors have great information. But short of googling every single thing I’m experiencing (spoiler alert: if you’re not experiencing cramping with bleeding, everything is normal. If you are having cramping with bleeding, call a medical practitioner ASAP). I’m ready to get my body back all to myself and be normal again. And don’t get me started about labor. Classes, books, videos, stories, all these things can only prepare you so much. Feeling it and experiencing it for myself is something that will surely bring great confusion.

 

36 Weeks Pregnant

Weekly Update

36 weeks pregnant is my last week I could deliver a preemie. That is very comforting to me. This week had a huge variety of emotions. On the happy side, I had my last baby shower – thank you to my amazing co-workers! On the stressed side: my OB appointment.

Elevated Heart Rate Scare

Wednesday morning I had my weekly OB appointment. As always, I walked the two blocks from my office to the doctor. Apparently this is now too much for my body. When I arrived my blood pressure was high and (much more alarming) Baby’s heart rate was in the 180s. Normally his heart rate has been in the 140s or 150s. So, I got to be hooked up to monitors in the NST room (non stress test) to watch his heart rate and to watch for contractions for almost an hour. That freaked me out!

After the monitoring, I went back in to see my doctor who assured me once I started resting, Baby’s heart rate went back to where it should be. Then we got to see him on the ultrasound. It’s been a month since I got to see my little guy. I found out he is head down and “ready to go.” We also got “the best sign ever that everything is good” by seeing him breathing! It was amazing to watch his little back rise and fall as he practiced his breathing. Also, still creepy to me that babies breath in the fluid…

Take it Easy

Once we determined Baby is ok when I’m resting. I got “sidelined.” At this point I could deliver a healthy little guy so bed rest isn’t needed, but we want him to “keep cooking” longer – especially this week when one set of grandparents are in the middle of the ocean and Jimmy will be 8 hours away for a couple days. So, I will walk as little as possible, keep as calm as possible, and limit all activity. Jimmy took this super seriously and came home early so he could be the one to go to the grocery store and cook dinner. So sweet!

Luckily this week was inauguration so I had off work on Friday, that made the Take-It-Easy plan super easy to follow. Netflix and delivery food here I come! However, I quickly discovered, I no longer enjoy an all-day binge watching marathon like I used to [what is the world coming to?!?!?]. So I’m only doing that sidelined thing for one day. I will still not walk much because I don’t want to elevate Baby’s heart rate, but I’m going to do normal things like the dishes or go to brunch.

Car Seat Inspection

Saturday morning, I decided I needed to get out of the house, so I made the terrible decision to go to Fairfax County car seat inspection event. As a local government employee, I could have asked the City of Falls Church Sheriff’s department to inspect my car seat. While I’m at work. Nope. I decided to drive myself to a parking garage in Fairfax. Sit in my car in the line that took two hours, get it inspected, then drive back. Holy swollen feet after that one.

In case you are wondering, we were in the 75% of people who incorrectly installed the car seat. It wiggled a bit. Basically we needed to drop the feet of the base down all the way, then tighten it, then look at the bubble level.

However, I was told it “was very good for a ‘mommy install” and “you can get multiple bases to install one in your mom’s car if she’ll be helping you.” Yes, because I went to a car seat inspection event by myself, I was labeled a single mother. Unfortunately, I put zero effort into my appearance that morning, so I also looked like a high schooler. Everyone was probably wondering where my MTV film crew was. I didn’t care at all, but Jimmy (who was out of town for work) did get a little offended and defensive about it when I told him. Sorry, but having two people sit in a car to get a car seat inspected is not a good use of time.

36 Weeks Pregnant Questionnaire:

How far along? 36 Weeks

How big is baby? 18.5″ and almost 6 lbs; the size of a honeydew melon

Maternity clothes? Yes.

Sleep: Tuesday night I slept for 5 hours straight! Other that that, I get up every 2 hours to pee.

Best moment this week: Seeing baby breathing

Movement: My doctor said he’s “a wild child”

Food Cravings: Chinese

Food Aversions: most food sounds bad, but I’m either STARVING or nauseous all the time 🙁

Gender: Baby’s a boy!

Labor Signs: He still feels like he’s trying to kick his way out aka he’s kicking my cervix on the regular. It hurts. I did find out he is head down and ready to go, that is very good news!

Pregnancy Symptoms: high blood pressure after “exercise,” nausea, fatigue, acne

Belly Button in or out? Out

What I miss: feeling like my body is mine

What I am looking forward to: meeting my little guy

Upcoming appointments/events: 1/25, 2/1 OB – we’re in the weekly appointments now

Weekly Wisdom: Slow down

Milestones: last week before full term

Bump Picture: ummm I didn’t take one… I have been taking them Saturday or Sunday each week but it was rainy or I was tired and I didn’t go to the store for a honeydew melon. I’ll hold the melon in my 37 week photo because that week is a winter melon which sounds similar to honeydew.

17 Weeks

Monday was labor day. I thoroughly enjoyed the long weekend. Summary: We went to the cottage, watched college football, went to Joe’s for lunch, moved around furniture to prepare for the nursery.

Thursday Jimmy headed to my parents’ to stay the night so he could get up early on Friday to go hunting and then head to the Eastern Shore for more hunting Friday afternoon-Saturday. After hunting, he raced back home so we could watch the Battle at Bristol. Of course I was disappointed by the loss, I mean, we basically handed Tennessee the win with two fumbles inside the 20. I’m choosing to remember the 1st quarter and how excited I was with the drive and fire we had starting off.

Saturday morning I went for my first pregnancy run. It felt pretty good. I was up early (before 7 am) and it wasn’t too hot yet, so I decided to grab my shoes and give it a go. I definitely listened to my body and didn’t even try to push myself. I “ran” one mile in 11:31 and then walked three miles. I am still sore today (Monday). I’m thinking I’ll keep the slow pace so I don’t pump up the heart-rate too much but increase the miles as I feel better and stronger.

Sunday I went to a wonderful brunch with some co-workers hosted by an amazing former co-worker – we miss you Laura! Sunday evening, we had a cookout with Jimmy’s parents & Katie to celebrate his mom’s birthday. It’s always great to see family.

Questionnaire:

How far along? 17 Weeks

How big is baby? The size of an onion, pear, or pomegranate (depending on the source). I originally went with a pomegranate, but it was super small, so I got a pear on a later grocery trip. [I was surely not posing with an onion.]

Maternity clothes? Pretty much yes to all. I still wear some normal dresses and shirts.

Sleep: I wake up exhausted every morning. I’m also back to my wishing I could nap every afternoon

Best moment this week: setting up most of the nursery furniture

Movement: I feel flutters when I talk to baby

Food cravings: soups, salads, ice cream, Peiking Pavilion chicken lo mein

Food Aversions: haven’t really wanted to eat much meat

Gender: I’m still thinking girl so we’ll probably find out baby’s a boy

Labor Signs: this question is irrelevant until later

Pregnancy Symptoms: tired! hungry!

Belly Button in or out? In but it’s coming out more and more

What I miss: a cold beer with my college football – however I smelled one of Jimmy’s and it seemed DISGUSTING so I really don’t have any desire to drink, I just miss the experience of tailgating maybe?

What I am looking forward to: finding out gender

Upcoming appointments/events: nothing until the ultrasound 9/19

Weekly Wisdom: won’t get to use this one for a while but I read it on a blog and want to make sure I remember it: when you make the bed for a crib, layer one waterproof mattress protector, one sheet, one waterproof mattress protector, one sheet. That way when baby has a blowout/leak/spit up in the middle of the night, you just strip the top combo (sheet & protector) and there’s another ready to go underneath. No fumbling around at 3 am to find a new sheet and realizing all the mattress protectors are in the laundry.

Milestones: baby’s cartilage is turning to bone

Bump Picture:

Kai is over this bump pic. Yep, I’m wearing white after Labor Day, I’m a rebel 🙂

Dress: Lilly Pulitzer Felicity Dress in Resort White Shellabrate [I got it via Lilly’s summer sale]

Labor Day Weekend

Saturday we headed to the cottage as soon as Jimmy got back from lacrosse. Tech was playing our first game at 12:30 and I was NOT missing kickoff. I was also needing to go to Wawa before the game so I could get the Pumpkin Spice latte & (heated up) turkey sub I’ve been dreaming about. So leaving on-time was crucial.

Having college football back makes me so happy 🙂

The weather was crazy in Southern Maryland – so windy! Thanks to Hurricane Hermine (I prounounce this Hermione after the Harry Potter character #wontstop). So we had a pretty low key time watching college football, snacking on some bagel bites, napping, relaxing.

Bridge view of Solomon’s Island, MD

We did adventure down to the pier during halftime. Jimmy noticed our bench had blown off the pier and was floating down the cove. So, my dad and Jimmy raced over to the cottage proper to grab a row boat and go rescue the bench.

row boat bench rescue

Sunday my Dad steamed up some crabs for us to take home. Then we headed back to VA around 4.

Maryland crabs! And that Disneyland shirt Jimmy loves so much

Monday was so nice to have a day off! Jimmy got up to go to basketball. I planned on sleeping in, but I got up around 7, mainly because I was starving. I took the morning to relax by making a k-cup cappuccino, honey whole wheat flax-seed pancakes, and watching some TV with Kai. Then I finally put away all my normal work clothes and replaced my closet with all my maternity clothes I have thus far. <– It’s already making getting dressed so much easier. I still have to go through my drawers to pack up most of my t-shirts, leggings, pants, and shorts.

Jimmy got home around 11 and asked if I wanted to go to Joe’s for their buffet lunch. Umm, YES!!!! Joe’s buffet is one of my favorites. It was delicious.

When we got home, we decided to move furniture. We moved our office to our downstairs guest room (from baby’s room) my huge white dresser up to baby’s room, and finally rearranged the layout in baby’s room. I really wanted to do all the furniture moving during this month so I wouldn’t be big and unable to help. I feel so much more settled and calm now that we have this project done. Now I can decorate 🙂

Sunday evening, Jimmy made us chicken pot pie for dinner and we watched more college football. Overall, this was a great weekend!

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

This weekend we got our Christmas tree!

My family has always gone to HomeDepot for our trees so that’s where Jimmy & I went this weekend. So did the majority of the Arlington/Falls Church area because we had the longest line I’ve ever seen. Totally worth it though.

After surviving the line, we [Jimmy] tied the tree to my car ourselves and drove on home #independent.

Then it was time to start decorating.

Kai wasn’t sure if he liked this tree. Or the decorating. Or us moving his bed. He doesn’t like change. We’re working on it.

Putting the first ornament up. Ignore the sweet wrist brace, I took a little tumble on an outdoor parking garage ramp at work. It was slippery and raining and I stumbled away with a sprained wrist and some bruises.

If Kai was happy earlier, he’s definitely not happy now.

He loves me really. He just isn’t a fan of that reindeer costume. Unfortunately I am a huge fan of it and so he wears it every year 🙂

Our Christmas mantle.

And our post-decorating family selfie. At this point Kai is tired. He spent the next 30 minutes sleeping on the couch.

Later that night we went to my work Holiday party. Where I took zero pictures but we had a blast.

Sunday brought on my Mom’s birthday and snow/ice. We ventured out for dinner with my parents, Kurt & Kate at Matchbox and then champagne and cake at our house.

I haven’t found the motivation to put up lights outside yet… I put a wreath on our door so that counts right?

Starting New Years Resolutions Early

As cliche as it is, in 2014 I am going to get healthier. In fact, I’ve already started.

I started the Couch to 5K program (it’s a free app for your smartphone). Like the name says, it takes you from the couch to running a 5K over the course of 9 weeks by alternating between walking and jogging 3 times a week for about 30 minutes a workout until you build up to running a 5K. This very nice calm sounding woman tells you when to run and when to walk. You can play your music while you workout and there are multiple timers so you can countdown your workout. I love it. I’ve never been a runner – mainly because I keep foolishly thinking I am a runner so I try to go out and run 3 miles without any practice or warmup and end up not being able to walk the next day, so this is an amazing program to keep me working harder but at a realistic pace.

We’ve also started eating healthier. I’ve started preparing some fish for dinners. Last night was an epic fail but the idea of a chicken and vegetable stir-fry will definitely be in our rotation again (once I have the right ingredients and actually thoroughly cook it). I used to think a meal wasn’t complete without carbs but I’m starting to be ok without the rice or bread or pasta added – occasionally – I’m not going too extreme.

I’m also in love with vitaminwater zero now that it’s sweetened with truvia. Yum.

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Jimmy & I also love doing a BodyPump class at Gold’s, sometimes with Kurt & Kate. Although this has taken a decrease in frequency since I started coaching. However, in 2014, we will be getting back on a group workout schedule to keep it fun and motivating. And I’ll post updates here to keep myself accountable 🙂

Next up in our lives: birthdays (my Mom’s this weekend, then Jimmy’s), basketball season for cheerleading, Christmas, our Disneyland vacation, and New Years Eve. Lots to look forward to in our house.